Generally Speaking

As you can tell, I spent most of my career in the Far East area, with a few TDY's to Europe.  I  have "been around the block", as they say.  Military families know that it's not about the money.  When you first get in, it's usually because; a) you need a job or career, b) you want to see more of the world, c) you don't have any other options, and d) the choice; military or jail!  Most people join with the idea of doing one hitch and getting out. And many do just that!  But now they have training and skills they didn't have before, and a better chance in life. But, for me, as I spent more time in the military, and learned a skill or skills, and started to be proud of those skills, it became more about the job and the people I spent time with.  It became more about professionalism and the idea of helping helpless people. It became more about who and what I stood for. The friends I  made in the military are the best kind there is. True friends who went thru "the stuff" with you. You became closer with them sometimes than you were with your own family. In the civilian world, you can have "friends" too, of course.  Some are truly good friends.  Most are not.  You think they are a good friend until you really, really need them. And then their true colors show. If it costs them something, then they aren't going to do it. Speaking only of my closest friends; if I need them, they will be there.  If I need money, it will come.  If I need them to travel halfway around the world to get me out of trouble, they will come.  Even if it is at big cost to them. THAT is a friend! I woould do the same for them, even if I have it or not.  I'll get it.  I have done that already many times. But I would never take advantage of that for my own needs.

These types of relationships and understanding do not happen overnight.  They are built by years.  Most people have to do an "attitude adjustment" when they first join the military.  They have to get rid of some of their personal baggage, including gangs, streettalk, ethnic isolation, and ingrained hatreds.  They have to slowly discover that there is more to the world than their little area and their little groups that they came from. Sometimes these changes don't happen fast, as it takes time to adjust to a lifetime of wrong thinking. Sometimes it happens very quickly, because the person is "wanting" a drastic change in their life.